What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention

Are you wondering what to text a guy to get his attention?  Especially, if you are in the early stages of learning digital dating it can be very challenging!  How do you get him to engage and respond?  How do you avoid blowing it and sending him into ghost-land? After all, you are not a writer. So it can be very hard.  But not any more. So here are eight messaging secrets that will have it raining men.

Tip 1: Use the Old Best Friend Technique

Imagine texting one of your best friends or a dear relative. Think about how connected, accepted and warm you feel as you write the text. And how comfortable, real, and relaxed you are with this person. Now imagine being that connected to a new match. A great fantasy, right? The truth is, you CAN use the same kind of experience and feeling  when connecting to a new guy. Simply program yourself to be an old friend or relative who is entirely comfortable with him.. He will feel the vibe in your message!

Tip 2: Use a phrase that comes from your most confident self

Guys love a woman who values herself, who is confident about just how fabulous she is. Men who are winners like to work to win a woman. This kind of confidence is like catnip to them! Here’s how to harness your confidence: Remember a time when you felt confident, lovable and loving.  I call this your Diamond Self identity.  So give that identity a nickname, like Chosen Goddess of Light and Love, Amazing Grace, Vivacious Vixen or Beloved Mighty Isis. Then ask yourself, what would my empowered high-value Diamond Self say? What would she write in in this particular message? Feel into it. Imagine the great self-valuing things she would say. You will get amazing messages coming out of you!  Irresistible messages!

For example if a guy puts a heart on your profile photo, you could message him:  I see you have good taste 

Another example, to use to respond to a guy who hints you may live too far away is: An amazing woman is worth traveling for! 

An additional example, in response to the question, Why have you been single so long?  You would say, I’ve been enjoying a super-cool career!  Just recently I decided I’m ready for to meet one lucky guy 

Tip 3: End your message with a question.

If you end your message or text with a question, you will get the guy’s attention because you are letting him know you are interested in him and his life.  Plus this will also make it easy for him to respond to you—he doesn’t have to come up with something new that is clever and engaging.  Ask general, casual, open-ended questions like How did your day go? Do you enjoy living here? How did you get interested in X? What drew you to my profile?

Tip 4: Use emojis for flirting

The emojis provide the non-verbals, the warmth and the flirty feeling tone for him to respond to.  So use smiley faces, winking faces, blowing- kiss faces.  One in each text works well. For example, in replying to this message from a guy, which reads:

Hi again, Joanne! Tell me, are you on the front lines these days? I ask because it says you are a medical professional.

BTW, I live in NYC, Manhattan.

So you could reply:

Hi Bob! Yes, on the front lines, but sooo safe and getting a great deal from being of service.  Believe it or not, there are laughs too!   Are you WFH?

Tip 5:  You call the shots in the interaction!

Guys love a bit of a challenge from a confident, flirty woman. You don’t need to respond directly to a request or answer any questions he asks.  Stay in your comfort zone. You decide what wonderful, empowered flirty message you will write.

So if early on a guy texts, Send me your pic please so I can add to your contact, you can reply: Oh those are quite valuable, LOL!  I’d have to get to know you! 

Or if he texts, Hi it’s Jason!  What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?  You can respond with, I’m in a great place, Jason! And one lucky guy will get to join me.

If possible share a specific experience you enjoyed related to an activity he mentions and add a question about it. For example, if he mentions the Space X launch, you might write, I saw the take-off live! It was amazing!  Did you see it?

Tip 7: Use his name if you have it and flirt by throwing in a bit of a challenge

Using his name is another awesome way to create a feeling of connection between you. And giving him a bit of a challenge is a great way to flirt!  If he’s into baseball, you could say something like, Well, Jason, if they ever play baseball again, what about a Red Sox-Cubs World Series? How cool would that be? This kind of flirting, coupled with your confident messaging is irresistible!

Tip 8:  Be upbeat and fun

Guys love to have fun!  So have fun with them.  For example, you could say, I just had a breakthrough in my strawberry shortcake recipe! One taste and you’ll be hooked (fair warning) Or, I always wake up smiling. I think it could be your fault.

So there you have 8 key tips for texts that will grab a guy’s attention!